PROVO: EMANCIPATED! JUST IN TIME FOR BLACK HISTORY MONTH!

PROVO, NOW THAT WE HAVE YOUR EARS, WE WILL ANNOUNCE THE JUCIEST NEWS SINCE GOTH PROM!

ARE YOU READY?

CAN YOU HANDLE IT?

YOU'VE BEEN WAITING A WEEK FOR THIS!

ROLLING BACK PRICES....

20% OFF EVERYTHING IN THE ENTIRE STORE!

SWEATERS!

JEWELRY!

GOING, GOING, GONE!

PRESIDENT'S DAY SALE AT

COAL UMBRELLA!

COAL UMBRELLA!

COAL UMBRELLA!

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RECAP: Maht Paulos is tits. The Coal Umbrella is having a HUGE SALE. We got your attention, and now we don't need it anymore. Thanks for the mean comments, but really, it's all about the SALE!

20% OFF!

HAVE YOU HEARD?

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CUT OUT THIS TWEETY BIRD AND GET AN ADDITIONAL .05% OFF!

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COAL UMBRELLA! IT'S WHAT FUN IS!

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LINCOLN FREED THE SLAVES!

COAL UMBRELLA IS FREEING US FROM OVERPRICED VINTAGE!

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THAT'S YOUR SECOND CHANCE TO CUT OUT THE TWEETY BIRD!

SERIOUSLY BIG SALE!

*WHILE SUPPLIES LAST!

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HUNGRY AFTER A BIG SALE?

PRESENT ALL THREE HIDDEN TWEETIES

AND RECEIVE

AN

ABSOLUTELY

FREE

SPECIALTY DRINK

OF YOUR CHOICE

FROM

LOS HERMANOS!

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DIABLO VERDE! DIABLO ROJO!

CAN'T DECIDE?

BRING IN SIX TWEETIES!

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WHAT THE HELL! WE'RE THROWING IN ONE MORE TWEETY!

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